TEXT: I Corinthians 13:4a

SUBJECT: What Love Is #1: Longsuffering

Eleven years ago I tried to expound this chapter in some detail. I was blessed by it; maybe some of you were too. I'd like to do it again; here's why: No matter how much one has said about love, he hasn't said too much. No matter how well he has practiced it, he still has plenty of room for improvement.

Perfection is not attainable in this life; it shouldn't be your goal. But growth in love is possible. It is furthered by the work of God's Spirit and by our yielding to His loving influence.

Will you submit to His ways? If you will, you must start here: with love. Jonathan Edwards called it: "The sum of all true grace in the heart". I think he was right. Let's see. God give us the eyes, for Christ's sake. Amen.

The theme of this chapter is obviously "love" or "charity". That's why it is so often read and preached on at weddings. I have no objection to this, but that's not quite the sort of love Paul is here extolling. The love he's describing is "brotherly love" or love in the Church.

The Corinthians had a lot of problems. They had, for example, cliques in the church; they abused the Lord's Supper; they were lax in their discipline; they went to court against each other; they misused their gifts; and so on. What a mess! How could it be cleaned up? By practicing brotherly love! Like a patent medicine, love is "one cure for many diseases". It's good for what ails you.

The importance of love is stressed in the first three verses. Nothing can make up for its absence--not tongues, not prophecy, not knowledge, not faith, not generosity, not even martyrdom. Preachers often overstate their case; Paul isn't. For these very things are mentioned about the Church of Laodicea, but it comes under a severe judgment because it had "left [its] first love". We mustn't think that Calvinism or missionary support can ever make up for a lack of love. They cannot; not all the world can.

The duration of love is eternal. The special gifts of the Early Church "failed, ceased, and vanished away". But love has not...and cannot. How could it? "God"--after all--"is love". And "He who abides in love abides in God and God in him".

What is love? Paul doesn't tell us. At least not here. But that's no problem at all; he does something better than that; he tells us "what love does and doesn't do".

The first thing "love" does is "suffer long". This means to hold your tempter. Love does not snap to its own defense; it is not quick to avenge every wrong; it is not eager to find fault with others.

It is illustrated in the life of David. His kingdom--you recall--was overturned by his son, Absalom. The king and a few supporters are fleeing the capital for who knows where? On their way out, a man appears by the name of Shemei. Shemei has a member of Saul's family and was nursing an old grudge against David. Now that he's down, Shemei strikes! "You bloody man! You bloody man!" David's bodyguard asks leave to take off the head of this "dead dog". The king, though, replies: "What have I to do with you, you son of Zeruiah? So let him curse...It may be the LORD will look on my affliction, and will repay me with good for his cursing this day..."

This tells us something about the trait, doesn't it? Something important. It tells us that longsuffering is not a weakness of character, but a strength. Shemei was armed with dirt clods; David's man with a sword. He could have easily killed the offender, but David chose the hard thing: He let him go.

Nahum 1:3 combines the two: "The LORD is slow to anger and great in power".

Thus, the man who "lets nothing go" is weak--too weak to master his own passions. As it is written: "He who rules his spirit [is mightier] than he who takes a city" (Proverbs 16:32).

"Longsuffering" is an old English word that ought to be revived; it is wonderfully descriptive. Take it apart and you find that it assumes a couple of things, things we know, but sometimes forget. They are:

The suffering can take one of two forms. Or both. A Brother may ignore you. This hurts; we all want to feel valued and loved--and there's nothing wrong with this, as long as it's in moderation. Each member has a place in the Body of Christ--a vital place. When we forget that, we sin and hurt others.

The other possibility: A Brother may just "be on you all the time". Some people are like burlap underwear. They're agony to be around, but a never-ending discomfort. After a while, we're tempted to explode, but we mustn't because "love suffers long".

Our Lord Jesus is "The Prophet who was to come into the world". Never did He more truly prophesy than when He said, "Offenses must come". Sometimes one-by-one; sometimes in bunches. But in either event, this is why we need love so badly.

Longsuffering is an invisible grace, but it can be seen in what it does. To be more accurate, it what it refrains from doing. What is that? Two things, chiefly:

It does not take revenge. All sins are foolish, but none more so than revenge. It creates a cycle of action, reaction, response, counter-response, on and on it goes. Till someone breaks the cycle; till someone "suffers long". We all agree with this...so long as that "someone ain't me!" But it has to be you! There is no one else.

It does not dwell on the wrongs that others do. Some people long for revenge, but are too scared to take it. And so they do the next best thing: They sulk. And take an interior revenge, you might call it. Yet our Lord equates evil thoughts with murder, doesn't He? Both are horrid; neither is consistent with brotherly love.

Our example here is Jesus Christ, "Who when He was reviled, did not revile again; when He suffered, He did not threaten" (cf. I Peter 2:23). At Mount Sinai, God called Himself "longsuffering"; on Mount Calvary, He proved it.

Longsuffering is not that hard, if only we could exempt one or two people from it. Does the Word allow that? It doesn't. I Thessalonians 5:14 has it: "Be patient with all". As a good Calvinist, I know "all" doesn't always mean "all without exception". But here? Who is the exception? Name him. I dare you!

If God is our model, the exception will be pretty hard to find. He suffers long with "the just and the unjust; with the good and with the evil". So should we; that what our Lord means when He says, "Be perfect, even as your Father in heaven is perfect".

We must remember what fellow believers are--members of God's family. Do you parents approve of your kids fighting with each other, tattling, being impatient, and so on? If not, remember in Christ, we're not parents and children--but brothers and sisters! Not older brothers bossing around the little ones; not big sisters, fussing over their things and locking their doors. But equals in the Household of God.

We must remember that God loves all His people equally. If He is hurt by the wrong others have done you, won't He also be hurt by the wrong you return them? That sister you're scolding is loved by God! Christ died for that Brother you're giving the cold shoulder! In hurting others, we hurt the Lord.

We must remember that God has a way of avenging all wrongs. And that He will do a much better job of it that you or I. "Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord".

Ultimately, there's no cure for a quick temper but the example and will of Jesus Christ. Will He suffer so much wrong without a word, and we bear so little? Will His Word be our Rule? Or must we have our own way?

May God help us to live in brotherly love. And start here: "Love suffers long".